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P25KRunning

P25K – Week 4

17th September 2018 — 0

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Run 1 (09/09/2018)

Another nonsense run I’m afraid. The target was 3km I managed 1km because I was determined to attack it and secure a new 3km record, literally no pacing at all. I got round the first km in 6:49 and was dead. More specifically I couldn’t be arsed to suck up what would have been a painful and slow last 2km.

I broke the cardinal rule yet again do the distance first. If I want to do a quick lap make it the bloody last one not the first! I’ll be back out again tomorrow to do 3km, forget the pace. I was aiming this week to just get out and run 4 straight forward runs, not a great start.

Run Rating : 

Run 2 (10/09/2018)

One of the biggest challenges I have running is fitting it in, which is a bit crazy considering I have very little else I actually have to do. But one way or another I find myself struggling to carve out a specific regimented time of the day, part through apathy and part through well just “stuff”.

Today was a perfect example. In the end I ended up running back from the local pet store where we’d been to try new collar’s/harnesses on the pup. Wen picked us up after work, drove us up there and I resolved to run back, a quick check on Google Earth indicated that a slightly indirect route would be over the required 3 km.

It occurs to me that this, let’s call it abandonment running might just be what I need, as:

  • it’s a non-circular route, I’m really starting to struggle with running around in circles (see last week).
  • getting back home is a fixed primal goal I can get behind
  • less reason to quit – i.e. I have to cover the distance anyway so I might as well do it running it’ll be quicker

So with that in mind and the pup fully kitted out with a new set of bondage gear which all turned out to be slightly too big (will have to wait a week or two before he grows into it), I started running back on a cool and slightly windy evening. No doubt about it summer is over.

The first kilometre was easy, I’m a bit concerned when the app chimes in indicating the split time as 7 min 5 secs. That’s a little too quick (see the last run). Luckily the 2nd km is all downhill. I loved this part of the run, just plodding away with the sun going down behind me and the fact it was all new terrain.

I hit the 2km mark just as I ran out of down hill, time to get to work. I’m trying to plot a route back, I believe there’s a short cut through a pedestrian area, I’ve never been here before and I’m mentally juggling the geography. I decide to risk it, it’s the start of a long climb back up, all the earlier downhill didn’t come for free.

As I’m going up the road I realise I’ve made a terrible mistake, not in terms of the route, it’s on target, but in terms of the ambience. Let’s put this delicately, I’ve turned into chav street and I’ve got no option but to keep on running. Not surprisingly I’m attracting some attention as I go chugging past, luckily thanks to my earphones I can’t quite hear what the slag in her bathrobe (fag hanging out of her mouth) shouts to her mates. I dance around the teenagers conspiring to place their bikes in my path and just keep on going., holding my breath past the cloud of vapour and weed and finally make it to the end of the road. Needless to say I won’t be taking that shortcut again.

The last km has been uphill and between having to dance around, hold my breath and generally trying to look like someone not to be messed with, I’ve wasted a lot of energy. I can feel it as I finally hit a bit of a flat. I’m out here for 3 km so I’m not going to stop before that and I’m negotiating with myself to make it all the way home. But I’m having to dig deep, nausea as always at these times is threatening. I start the process of trying to calm everything down as I start back up another incline, the app chimes in with 7 min 40 secs. Not bad considering most of it was uphill.

I’m still a distance from home and I’m struggling to get everything back under control. I start playing the “just” mental game. Just get to the end of this road, just get to the top of that hill, just get to that corner, just hold on one more minute. Yet again I remind myself this is the bit that counts, hanging on when you don’t want to. I finally make it home, that was a tough 3.7km, especially the last 700 metres.

I’ve set a new 3 km PB of 21:53 shaving 22 seconds off my previous record, that’ll do for today.

 

This was my first run through an urban environment, I’d generally kept to the parks. I can’t say it really appealed to me even ignoring the unfortunate detour. If you have to be out here running I’d much prefer to do it around some greenery without the risk of being run over every few yards. On the other hand being dropped off far (let’s be honest not really that far) from home and having to run back was fun, it kept the mind occupied pondering routes and the new and varied terrain.

My next run is 5 km and I have a plan to go and run back at the field where I originally started C25K, I’m thinking it’ll be fun to contrast the improvement. The Great North Run was last weekend, it’s a half marathon and as usual there were some incredible inspirational stories. For me though it was a reminder that 5k is not a stopping point, it’s meant to be a milestone on towards 10k and maybe even 21k, I need to push on!

Run Rating : 

Run 3 (12/09/2018)

Change of plan I thought I’d just pop out and do a quick 5k after lunch when the pup would be snoozing. I’d plotted a circular route that was 5km door to door and took in half the route I did in the last run, mostly the downhill bit. It had been raining all morning, so I took my chances between showers to get out there.

The first km was going to be the toughest it’s all up hill, km 2 is flat, km 3 is downhill, km 4 is flat and the last km finished up hill for a few hundred metres. On paper it looked like a solid route. I got to the first km, not surprisingly a bit fatigued, spent half the 2nd km trying to get everything back under control and then noped out of the second half of the 2nd kilometre. I walked the last half of the 2nd km, and then proceeded to run and walk alternately 500m until I managed to drag my sorry ass back home.

I failed pure and simply because I mentally talked my way out of it at the 1.5km mark, having done the hardest km on the route. There wasn’t any huge physical drama, I was a bit of out of breath still recovering from going uphill for a km, but nothing I haven’t seen before. I definitely need to do something about this, it’s getting frustrating. I can do the distance but I routinely still struggle to commit to the run, i.e. grow a pair.

The pointless stats:

The only useful bit of data that came from this run was my feet were killing me in the walks, just like they used to when doing C25K intervals. I’ve run a number of 5k’s now and not suffered anywhere near as much as going back to effectively internal running. Maybe it’ll give me another incentive to not stop running in the future!

I’m not going to rerun this FAIL. I’ve got 2 runs left this week one of them WILL be a 5k let’s hope I can man up between now and then.

Run Rating : 

Run 4 (14/09/2018)

I was out walking the pup around the woods most of the morning, by the time we got back he was shattered so I threw some food at him and shoved him in his crate and headed to the local park on what was an overcast slightly cool midday.

I was pondering if I should eat or just get out there. Having eaten nothing all day and walking most of the morning. The texts book says eat something light (i.e. a banana) 30 mins before running. Unfortunately we are all out of banana’s and I don’t have the luxury of 30m’s. So we’ll be burning what’s left of last nights lasagne or maybe some of my ample body fat would be a real bonus!

On the walk up I’m trying to mentally get my act together, I need a 5k bad. I’ve done a few at this park so there isn’t a question of can I do it, it’s just a question of will I turn up and suck it up when it starts to get tough. I’ve taken an extra lap round the park to build up my resolve and stretch a little more.

I set off on the first km deliberately slowing it all down, “get the distance” going around my head like a an inane mantra. I know I need to get around these early km’s efficiently, failure to manage energy levels will make the last 2 km’s a living hell and increase the likelihood of failure.

Once round the park and the first km is done, no problems. The 2nd km goes past fairly easily as well. I’m just avoiding trying to think how much time or distance I have left, just run each km. Standard running playlist, I need to get around to changing it, it’s starting to get a bit stale.

I hit 3km, 3rd time up the incline the toughest bit of the route. Mentally I’m fighting a voice telling me that’s enough for today, no shame walking away with 3k. Not today, I’m going the distance, I tell myself I’ve only got to go twice more round (or more specifically up). I’m over halfway and each step is now towards home! Don’t ask me, I know I’m running a circuit which is generally equidistant from home, but it helps to visualise getting over a hump and mentally ticking those last 2km’s off.

Hitting the 4km milestone I know I’ve got it done, it’s just a question of hanging on. My left knee is starting to hurt, that’s a bit worrying usually aches go away on these runs. I push on the pain is not that bad, more of a warning than a stop signal. I’m definitely feeling it and I decide to do the last 500m heading down the road towards home.

Not a spectacular run but an important one for me in terms of mental conditioning. The first 3km are not a problem at this 8:14 pace, but the last two km are far from fun. It’s here in this moment of duress I need to spend more time just soaking up the fatigue and mental barrage until I can ignore it.

 

As with most things in life the dread of something is usually far worse than the reality and for me it’s the same with running. That first 3km is inevitably interspersed with visions (if I fail to adequately distract myself) of what the last 2km are going to be like – i.e. it will hurt and it will be long.

In reality that last 2km is at best uncomfortable and the time passes surprisingly quickly. Far worse is the mental berating I give myself having failed, not because I gave everything and failed, there’s some glory in that, but because I gave up well before I had. I need to do a better job of remembering this while in that first 3km and stop tricking myself.

I have one more run this week. It’ll be Sunday as I’m going to need to go easy on my knee tomorrow, I don’t want any silly injuries, and I was given a clear warning today. I think I’ll aim for another 5k, no idea where yet.

Run Rating : 

Run 5 (16/09/2018)

Didn’t happen, as I ended up doing stuff the whole day. It was 8pm by the time we got back home and I was starving and knackered, so the thought of popping out for a quick 5k in the dark was always going to be a hard sell.

I’m also out of time for this week. as I realised I need to stick to a conventional Monday-Sunday schedule otherwise my Endomondo accumulative stats don’t work properly.

Last week I achieved a total of just over 12km according to Endomondo, although it was probably closer to 10km given I walked a good part of run 3. That is way short of my goal of running 16km a week (2x3km + 2x5km) and a reminder that I need to step up my commitment.

Stat Value Date
12-minute test 1.76km 1/9/2018
Farthest distance 5.04km 21/8/2018
1 km 06 min 38 sec 1/9/2018
1 mile 10 min 56 sec 1/9/2018
3 km 21 min 53 sec 10/9/2018
3 mile 37 min 15 sec 7/9/2018
5 km 38 min 30 sec 7/9/2018
Most calories burned 771 kcal 7/9/2018

I also need to start tracking how much walking I’m doing, I spend about an hour and half every day walking the pup and we are starting to get through some km’s. It obviously doesn’t directly count to running but it does count towards my broader weight loss goals and ultimately a skinnier me will translate into a faster me.

 

AnimalsDog Days

Archer – Weeks 7-8

3rd September 2018 — 0

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Time is flying, summer is officially over and we are into Autumn. There is a definite chill when standing in the garden at 6:30 in the morning waiting for Archer to get his day started. He is now 4 months old and has been with us for 2 months and he continues to grow at a staggering rate, unfolding like an organic transformer to reveal a full-size dog.

I don’t think I fully realised how much he’d grown until I recall him fitting with ease under the small coffee table we have in the front room. His days of snoozing under the table are long gone, he can now easily straddle the table. Of course, it doesn’t stop him trying to get under it on occasion.

He still continues to make progress:

  • socialisation – he loves meeting dogs and people, in that order. He’s probably met another hundred people and their pets in the last couple of weeks. He had his walking buddy Syd over for the day to get him used to other dogs in the house. He’s also booked into a new puppy club next Sunday.
  • cats – no longer a problem they walk past each other, even when Itchy is being a miserable sod and meowing at him. Scratchy has wanted to play with Archer and vice versa but they are talking a different language. As Wen pointed out, a dog tail wag means friend/excitement, a cat tail wagging usually means I’m annoyed back off. I’m sure they’ll figure it out and be frolicking before long. But this is a huge win for peace in the house.
  • training – we are still bedding in the basics, there’s learning and then there’s just reacting. I don’t think the commands are truly in there until he reacts without thinking. If he has to ponder a command there’s a good chance his belligerent side will often step in. Wen has bought a book of 101 tricks to teach your dog, there’s optimism.
  • toilet training – every time I think we are pretty much there we have a mistake. I literally got off the phone to my parents, saying how he hadn’t had an accident indoors only for him to lay a mostly liquid deposit in the middle of the living room. I swear he was listening, more likely I wasn’t! I’m sure he probably gave me a few clues. Someone said if you can go 14 weeks without an accident you can say he’s trained, I haven’t made 14 days yet, but at least we are beyond 14 hours.
  • hoovering – his incessant need to eat anything he can fit in his mouth continues. It means he can’t be out of my eyesight, on the odd occasion he is I will find him chewing on something, my least favourite was the drywall on the side of the house and that was after being just being fed.
  • swimming – no luck yet, I’ve tried him a few times once in the river and once in a lake but he’s flatly refused in both cases. Even when there is an adult golden retriever goading him into getting in and teaching him the ropes. I’ve no doubt it will come, maybe when his proper coat grows out.
  • separation – we’ve been crating him and going out, thanks to modern technology there is a webcam we can use on such occasions so that we can keep an eye on him. Typically he’ll whine for a couple of minutes, before giving a big sigh and going to sleep. He is good for an hour in his crate, 2 hours if he’s been properly fed and worn out beforehand. We, unfortunately, pushed it when we were at a family BBQ, he can’t make 3 hours. I was ten minutes too late, our bad.

I keep having to remind myself he’s only 4 months old, he’s doing extraordinarily well when you factor that in.

A day in the life

We have settled into a bit of a routine which starts early usually with him huffing and puffing and fidgeting around, just enough to ensure I can’t sleep but without being accused of waking me up. I put his collar on, get dressed and carry him downstairs. Yes to the world he might be a big pup now but behind closed doors, he’s still a pussy. We can’t afford the 10 minutes of drama it would take to get him to get downstairs on his own. So I still carry him downstairs, he must be hitting 16kg by this point, all bones and licks.

He does his morning business, needing only a few gentle reminders of why we are standing out there. Then to breakfast, cats get fed first, those are the rules. He then gets his mix of chicken and kibble. He’s got a new insanely expensive special tummy kibble we mix in to settle his stomach as he still continues to have episodes where he’s fast and loose. Not really a surprise as he still continues to hoover up everything and it’s not all going to agree with him.

After breakfast he goes back to sleep until about 9am, usually basking in a sunbeam and I can get on and do some work. We then head out for walkies to one of several parks, I try and mix it up to keep it interesting, dependent on the weather, the tides (I kid you not) and the availability of his walking mate Syd.

Dependent on the venue we usually walk around for a couple of hours, and yes I am aware he’s only meant to have 20 minutes of exercise at this age, but I honestly don’t classify walking 10 yards and getting fussed over exercise. The seasoned dog walkers just laugh and tell me we’ll be out here for hours, and as always they are right. It’s more an exercise in socialisation at this point, meeting as many different types of people and dogs as possible. I know most of the dog owners and their pets temperaments by now.

After walkies, we go back home so he can squeeze in another quick snooze before lunch. More food to bolster him up for the afternoon’s main event, sleeping. This is my other window to do some work in the day. He’ll typically wake up about 4 or 5 when we’ll do a tour of the garden and have a bit of a play. He’ll then occupy himself for an hour, usually chewing something, sometimes even things he’s meant to be chewing.

Somewhere between 6 and 7, he gets his last meal of the day, as always the cats get their evening meal first as they can be less than tolerant of any perceived favouritism. If Archer is having a bad day (gastrically) he might get some of his kibble replaced with rice, just to bind everything together. He loves rice and I love the benefits the next morning.

Early evening is playing and otherwise messing, we bought him a new snek friend I’m getting lots of fun out of tying it around him like a Boa constrictor and watching him walk around with it, I think he likes it as well. He’ll often get a frozen Kong (filled with cheese/meat) or some other treats.

This evening play session usually ends with zoomies, where for 5 minutes he will go bat shit crazy and race around like he’s on fire, burning up the last of the day’s energy. Then by 8:30 he’s done and falls back to sleep until somewhere around 10-11 where I wake him up (I get my own back for him waking me first thing) for one more visit to the garden, or moth collecting as I like to call it.

Finally, Wen takes his collar off and we take the long walk up the stairs to bed, he can go up them, it’s just down he hasn’t mastered. He’ll go to his crate, curl up and go to sleep with only the odd growl or scuttling of feet where he’s dream running.

Rinse and repeat, the next day with a slightly bigger/heavier pup. I still don’t lock him in his crate overnight and he’ll get up in the night and have a wander around and sleep in a few different places, seems to mostly based on temperature and stretching.

Digging It

I finally took Archer down to the local dog pen. A large fenced area where I could let him of his leash and he’d get an opportunity to properly practise his socialisation skills without the safety of me inches away ready to intervene. There was a father, his daughter and their beagle and for a quarter of an hour Archer had the stuffing kicked out of him by the beagle, he loved it. He’s never happier than when he’s on his back with a set of teeth around his throat. Every time you think it’s gone too far he pops back up tail wagging, eyes wide desperate for more.

After a good roughhousing the pups calmed down and started playing with the little girl. She had a stick and was quietly digging patterns in the sand and they were happy to help out with the hard work of turning her scratched sketches into trenches. Truly a joy to watch, although I have to admit a pang of envy at the speed she had both pups under her command.

As fit as a butcher’s dog

Archer’s weight and size is a constant subject of debate. He’s growing at an extraordinary rate but not in a uniform manner. He seems very lanky with large paws and knobbly knees on his long legs. He has a relatively small head on a long and thin neck, huge chest, skinny stomach going back to a rear section that lacks a lot of the muscle power of his front legs. And it all ends in a tail that has a strange kink in the fur half way along.  His coarse coat has been growing down his back in swirls, when he’s excited it turns out he has hackles that extend all along his back, making him look like he has a Mohican.

When he stretches you can often see his ribs and in the wrong light with his long legs flailing about he looks like one of the victims of neglect off of one of those terrible shock TV ads. A situation not helped by bumping into a couple with a 5-month-old golden retriever that was a good 2 inches taller, super fluffy and well rounded. Even at Archer’s prodigious growing speed, I’ll be amazed if he’s that size in just 4 weeks, we shall see.

He lost the first of his puppy teeth, the top two at the front (see photo above) they have already been replaced with adult equivalents. The rest of his baby teeth seem to be hanging in there for now.

Overall he’s a super fit and ungainly puppy. Most retriever owners I’ve met on my travels have thought he looked fit and warned of the dangers of going too far the other way, especially for this breed. I’ll just be a bit happier when he broadens out a bit as opposed to tending towards looking like a whippet.

An Eye for an Eye

Someone told Wen that there was a Nerf gun that fired tennis balls and she took it on herself to immediately order one. It turned up and sat on the table for a couple of days before I finally unboxed it and took the pup out in the garden for a trial. I must admit I’ve had (and modified) Nerf guns in the past and on the whole, they always lack power, not surprisingly in this age of kids wrapped in cotton wool and lawsuits. So I wasn’t really surprised when the first shot hardly travelled 20 yards, the pup still doesn’t get the idea of chasing balls, so he was even more nonplussed than I was.

I reloaded the gun and fired it again, ok that was a little better, it got some height and another few yards but it was far from spectacular. Archer decided it was so much fun he was going to go back to digging up moss out of the lawn in his favourite patch. I walked over and picked up the ball and reloaded the gun.

I shouted back at Archer to stop chewing the lawn, he was literally making a meal of it. He just looked up and gave one of his s***-eating grins before returning to his mossy meal and me with a loaded gun. Yes, I shot the ball in his direction with the intention of hitting the fence near him. and hoping the noise would be enough to wipe the grin off of his face.

Instead the Nerf gun launched the tennis ball like it was a rail gun and in spite of a crosswind and the fact that Archer was moving it hit him square between the eyes with such force as to throw him onto his back legs, he reared up in the air making an ungodly whining noise, his eyes  blinking rapidly. There was no doubt he really was stunned, when he got his senses back he’s skulked off tail between his leg and hid under a bush.

I’m mortified, trying to coax him back out he’s just flickering his eyelids at me, oh no. I finally get him out from under the bush and fuss over him, he’s still not a happy pup. He continues to blink oddly all the way back to the house, where I threw the gun in a storage bin before checking the safety information to confirm that it did, in fact, say in strict terms not to be fired at people, who would have guessed that it applied to dogs too?

We get in the house and I have a proper looks at his eyes, his left eye is definitely not right, he’s refusing to open it fully, probably because I keep poking my fingers at it. He seems OK though, it was probably the shock I tell myself, he’ll be OK I’m sure he’ll walk it off. Wen gets home I confess that HER gun has damaged the dog. He’s still half asleep, but he’s still not opening the eye fully.  Wen did point out that the aim is to fire the tennis ball away from you when the pup is with you.

Anyway we get to the evening I’m still not sure his eye is good, and I’m seriously worried I’ve blinded him. By this time he really is half asleep and trying to keep an eye open is a fruitless task. I put him in case crate for bed, walk over to turn the lights out, look back and he’s looking at me, one eye wide and one not. Oh crap, I rush him downstairs to show Wen and he’s fallen asleep in her arms, still unable to tell the extent of the damage. It’s too late for the vet, so I spend a sleepless guilt fueled night, thinking of all the worst case scenarios.

Next morning we’re checking him over, it’s a trip to the vet for sure. His left eye isn’t opening up normally, his right eye is fine. Wen’s looking up their opening times and I look down as Archer turns around, his left eye is open and bright and his right eye is half asleep. What the hell? A couple more blinks and both eyes are staring up at me …. got you! I could almost see the doggy grin!

It turns out a half-asleep retriever will often have squiffy looking eyes, I just never really had cause to scrutinise him that closely, but I have no doubt he took the opportunity to teach me a lesson. I got the message, he, on the other hand, is still eating all the moss.

 

P25KRunning

P25K – Week 3

30th August 2018 — 0

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Run 1 (30/08/2018)

Those more observant amongst you may have spotted a bit of a gap between my last run (25/08/2018) and this week’s first run. Today’s post is going to feel a lot like a confessional, forgive me father it has been 4 days since my last run and I have sinned, I committed the sin of sloth. I had to look up a definition of sloth, I think I’ve blocked the word out of my mind after watching se7en (now that’s a jump scare) the best I could find was a “habitual disinclination to exertion”. Ouch, that  absolutely nails my predicament, my laziness is truly habitual.

So let’s get into the bullshit reasons then. Sunday I was on a stag do for a mate, that entailed a 6 hour endurance karting race (one kart 5 drivers). If you’ve never tried it I would strongly recommend it, it’s a great day out. The only issue is for 5 and half hours of the race it was torrential rain, I don’t know about trench foot I had trench arse, having sat in 2 inches of water in a bucket seat for a couple of half hour stints. Thanks John for risking your phone and recording the carnage:

There were 19 teams and we came pretty much plumb last, 55 laps behind the eventual winner. We knew we were going to struggle when the top 5 teams, turned up with their own kit, replete with pit boards and computers for calculating fuel stops. We were there for fun, a lads day out, the majority of teams however where there to score points in an ongoing year long tournament and they had zero tolerance of old men, dawdling on the racing line as I discovered to my peril a few times. Its fair to say I had my fair share of spins (slicks in the wet, madness) and shunts so I was feeling fairly fragile come Monday morning.

I thought I’d therefore give running a miss on the Monday, it was still raining heavily so I spent most of the day entertaining the house bound pup, who was going a little stir crazy unable to burn off his energy. Now I’m not a masochist and I’m not getting any younger so this was a sensible move, I’m not feeling guilty in the slightest about taking the Monday off.

Tuesday and Wednesday on the other hand I had little excuse not to get out there. I managed to convince myself it was too wet on Tuesday. Which was nonsense, for a man that leaks liquids like a sieve, I really can’t get that much wetter in the rain. Then on Wednesday I was invited to play badminton, and I convinced myself that was enough exercise for one day, which it really wasn’t.

This is my biggest fear having completed C25K that I wouldn’t follow through and keep the habit of running going. This blog is a big part of keeping me on track in that respect.

I really liked the C25K structure and slowly improving milestones and I’m finding the lack of such incremental goals difficult. Yes I have my objectives but they are hardly bitesize, each will take weeks and months of concerted effort to reach and I am sadly lacking the discipline to get out there and do the ground work. I think I’ll need to draw up a more incremental set of milestones to somehow motivate myself, break the problem down.

I finally managed to guilt myself into getting back out there by the Thursday, you can tell it was bad by the fact it was 7 in the morning. I came to the conclusion I’m better off just getting it done as early as possible before I can come up with excuses why I can’t do it. Luckily the pup has me up by 6;30 most mornings so I made my mind up to get up early, get him and the cats fed and get out there.

It was decidedly chilly, in fact it might be my coldest run of the year, It’s officially Autumn tomorrow so it’s not going to get any better, get used to it! I was cataloguing my aches and pains up to the park, it was a long list. Reaching the top of the park (to make sure I warmed up) I started out on the first 1km lap.

It’s fair to say I wasn’t having fun, I wouldn’t say it was any harder than any first km I’d done but a combination of the temperature and general low energy levels (read still half asleep) was making it a drag. By the time I’ve done the 2nd lap I’d pretty much had enough. I played the same trick as last time and told myself I can run home, that would get me at least out to a pitiful 3k and all pretty much down hill. It appears my guilt at missing 4 days, didn’t extend to making up for lost time and putting a real shift in and reaching 5k. Too busy cataloguing problems, finding excuses.

Pacing wise, pretty much on the money for my current 8 min/km target pace for the 3 km’s I bothered to do.

 

This is yet another run, where physically I could have completed it but mentally I just didn’t turn up. It’s happened a few times now and it’s becoming the bottleneck to progress, I need to start finding a way to motivate myself to stay out there when I’d rather still be in bed with the pup keeping my feet warm. I’ve no doubt I’ll go into the next run, angry at this performance and do better and the cycle of seesawing will go on. My goal at the moment is to cement a solid 5k, I’ve only ever made the distance twice so far I really need get my head in the right place.

Run Rating : 

Run 2 (01/09/2018)

So much for my plan of getting up at 6:30 and going running in the park. The pup is on new kibble that is meant to help his digestion and it looks like it’s working he didn’t stir until 8 and I wasn’t going to miss the chance of a lay in. Wen was walking the pup over at the local park with a friend at 9, so I thought I’d tag along and run around the lake, perfect. A lay in and a sunny morning run around the lake, does life get any better. Especially when there’s a cafe that will rustle up a bacon roll.

Once round the lake and I set off, leaving the lady’s chatting on a bench, conscious that I actually have an audience for once and one I’m going to be passing about every 5 minutes. I hit the first kilometre in 6 min 47 secs. Oh crap I’v been show boating, idiot, rather than focusing on the run I’ve been prancing round the lake like a Lipizzan Stallion. Now I’m a mile in and I’ve set a new mile PB and I feel like crap.

I’m thinking I’ll hang in for at least 3km, that’s another 4 times round the lake, the thought goes down like a lead balloon, and like a stallion approaching Becher’s Brook I pull up as I pass the bench. Well that’s an all time low, 13 minutes? Pathetic, especially after only doing 3 km on the last outing, this is a worrying trend. I have half an hour to contemplate another failure as I take the pup for a walk up in the hills. To be fair I gave it about 5 minutes thought, it was far too nice a morning to ruin it with nonsense I can sort out later.

My god imagine if it had been a public race, I’d have probably run it like it was 400m and made it only 200m. Needless to say I’m running tomorrow, without an audience, I will get a long run in this week.

I did think of not even recording this run (I use the word loosely) but I guess it’s important to catalogue every form of failure. It looks like this weeks theme is going to be the seven deadly sins, today was pride.

Run Rating : 

Run 3 (02/09/2018)

After yesterdays lack lustre performance, I almost managed to talk my self out of running today. Yet again I managed to convince the pup to go back to bed after another 6;30 pop to the garden, this time until 9am when Wen got up, waking him up. Slap up breakfast and I managed to even fit in a 4 hour’s of Ghost Recon coop with a friend. Basically not a bad lazy Sunday morning.

Wen had agreed to catch up with our friend to walk the dog at the local park at 4:30, and it’s a glorious afternoon, the realisation there aren’t too many of those left this year finally guilted me into getting my running shoes on. I decided I’ll get up to the park just before they turned up and get most of my run done, I didn’t want a repeat of yesterday’s show boating nonsense.

Walking up to the park I’m trying to get my head in the game, I really need 5k and that means I need to start real slow and apply an energy conservation mindset. I’ve done it before I know what I have to do, let’s hope this time I can stick to the game plan.

The first km is not too bad, although it really seems to drag from a time perspective, it’s a bit slower than my 8 min/km target, but better safe than sorry. I don’t care about the time I WANT the distance.

Second km feels a bit better than the first km, I’ve settled into a reasonable pace. Split time comes in at 8 min 30 seconds. Very much slower, don’t care crack on. Just as I’m coming up to the 3k mark I spot Wen and co walking round the park, luckily avoid them on the first pass. Another mental reminder to focus on the job at hand.

The third km I’m starting to feel it on the incline back up to the top of the park. Not helped by having to dodge one kid trying to kill his mate by wielding half a tree, had to grab the branch and bark a “steady” at him. Didn’t stop to see if he completed his death blow.

Into the fourth km past the pup and the dog walkers, stay on target. This is starting to hurt, my feet are going numb and my breathing is starting to sound a little laboured. I tell my self this is the penultimate time up the incline and just about make it the top. I know if I can make it to the 4km mark I’ll be able to hang on to 5km.

I’ve had a voice trying to convince me to stop at 3 and 4 km’s, and it’s taking quite a bit of will power to ignore. I want 5K, “are you willing to do the work for it” the voice chimes back. I grit my teeth and get back to plodding away it.

Last time up the incline, my old friend nausea is threatening, I’ve got foam round my mouth that I’m having to brush away as I go past the play area, in case I scare the kiddies. It’s not pretty, but metre by metre it’s getting done. I just need to get to the top of the park, I dig in crest the hill and start the long downhill section. I can’t feel my feet anymore, my legs feel like lead weights and there’s a real threat my legs might give out. I just keep plodding away, I spot the girls and the pup on a bench, and just as get to them I get the 5k shout. I stagger to the bench, to get jumped up and down on by the pup, now that’s what you want at a finish line.

A 42m 38sec 5k, not my fastest, or my slowest and it’s not like I’ve got a lot of 5k data points. This one was purely about getting to the distance.

 

This run hurt, the last km was as tough as it’s ever got. It was difficult to get to the 4k mark mentally and then the last km was physically challenging as fatigue set in. Even with conservative pacing it took a sheer act of will to keep going and override all the cues to stop.

I still don’t feel like I have a solid grasp on 5k, but I am slowly building up a mental checklist:

  • if I don’t turn up at the field (and this is half the battle), I fail.
  • If my mindset is anything less than do or die, I’ll fail.
  • If I go too quick (no matter how good I think I might look), I fail,
  • If I’ve eaten/drank too much too close to running, I fail.
  • If I’m not willing to spend 8-10 minutes feeling like death (after 30 mins of running), then I fail.

I’m a huge believer that you can only truly master something when you’ve seen all the ways it can go wrong and understand how to avoid/fix them. The problem is I don’t think I’ve seen all the ways this can fail yet and until I have I won’t have mastered 5k. On to the next failure.

Run Rating : 

Run 4 (04/09/2018)

So much for my early morning runs. I couldn’t be bothered this morning and when the pup sneaked back into bed with Wen well that was it, we were all back there cats included. I then spent the entire day making excuses for not running. By the time it got to 5pm I’ve had enough of my bullshit, shoved some food in the oven and did a pup hospital pass to Wen on her way in from work.

Walking up the road, I’m trying to get my head in the game. I can still feel the last run in my legs and my left knee is aching a bit, probably more to do with sitting on the sofa oddly again. I decide rather than push it I’ll aim to do a fast 3km run, rather than 5km, I need to start getting into a pattern of short/long runs, that’ll mean my last run of the week will be 5k.

I get to the park just before 7pm, it’s cold and I’m surprised by how dark it’s getting seems like the nights are already starting to draw in. A reminder to sort out some warmer running kit at some point. The park is almost empty, no dog walkers, no other runners and no kids in the play area, well that’s a first. I decide to run anti-clockwise I might as well start flipping a coin on the subject.

First km and I’m being a little bit cautious I’m focusing on making my stride fast but efficient, trying slight variants, leaning slightly back and forward, shorter, longer strides. I get to the first km in 7:26, pretty quick for me. More importantly I’m feeling pretty fresh.

Into the second km, I’m just focusing on maintaining the pace. I finally pass someone, out for some evening air, I was starting to get worried that there was something more interesting going on somewhere and I was missing out. I’m quite liking this pace it seems comfortable, I hit the 2km in 7:29.

Right, last lap, last time up the incline, I decide I’ll run out of the park at the end and start heading home, should leave me a few minutes of cool down walking time. I pick up the pace a little and get to the 3km with a final 7;22. In total 22:30 and a new 3km PB. Not bad if I could maintain it for another 2km I could be looking at a 38 minute 5k which would be nice progress.

Walking home I realise my knee is feeling fine now, I probably should have done a bit more stretching/limbering up.

 

I really enjoyed this run, I could have gone faster but it wouldn’t have been as enjoyable. I definitely need to start mixing 3km and 5km runs up. My next run will need to be 5km to round out the week, not sure if I’ll try for the 38m, a sub 40m would be nice though. Let’s just see if I can get my arse out there before midday would be a bonus.

Run Rating : 

Run 5 (06/09/2018)

Right here’s the plan. I have to drop the car off for it’s service first thing, So Wen will have the pup until she leaves for work and I’ll have time to do a quick 5k on a local track on the way back from dropping the car off. I can even pick up some breakfast on he way back to taking over pup minding duties. Great, it’s an early start (tick), a new running track all on the flat (tick) and the promise of breakfast (tick).

That WAS the plan. I drop the car at the dealership, find the track after a bit of a wander and it’s perfect, totally flat, it’s pretty much 400m (give or take) and there’s no one around. Time to get to work, I dig out my … oh crap I’ve forgotten my earphones. No worry was reading a post the other day where someone said they enjoyed listening to their breathing when running, let’s give it a go.

Once round the track, 400M probably a bit quick for 5k. I need to slow it down a bit. My brain is off doing some maths and casually drops in the fact I’ll be going around this track a dozen times, and that as they say is that. I managed to get to 800M and I’d had enough, the thought of going around this tedious track another ten times listening to nothing but my breathing and footsteps was too much. I couldn’t even convince myself to complete 1k, let alone drag it out to 3k.

It’s madness, I’ve run multiple 5k’s in far worse conditions, this track is practically flat, I should be dancing around it. This is clearly a mental issue, why should I care if 5k is around a track or in a single non-repeating straight line, it’s just one step after the next in either case. I described my running previously as brittle and this is another case in point. I clearly need to develop a strategy for running on a track, probably just the usual break the problem down into running 5 laps at a time. Because at the moment if I have to do double digits I have a mental breakdown.

We’ll chalk this one up to bad preparation again, I wonder if I’d had my earphones if I would have just zoned out and got it done? I don’t think so, but I’m pretty sure I would have got further. To be clear I wasn’t even physically pushed I was just mentally defeated, by the maths, just bizarre. I wonder what I would do on a treadmill, never used one.

Needless to say I’ll be running again tomorrow and it will be for 5k or a bed in A&E.

Run Rating : 

Run 6 (07/09/2018)

I’ve decided after the last run I would go from running around a track to a straight 5k route around the Great Lines park in a clockwise direction. Never tried it before (this way around) and I know that the 4th km at least on paper is going to be tough, pretty much all uphill. So that’s nice.

Got my earphones this time and take a walk up to the hospital, hopefully the fact the run starts right next to the local A&E centre isn’t an omen. I’m fired up for this one after the ups and downs of this weeks running I’ve definitely turned up with the bit firmly between my teeth.

The first km is easy, coming in at a 7:42 min/km which is slightly quicker than I really should be targeting but my last 3km run running sub 8 min/km felt pretty good so we’ll stick with it, for now. Nice cool breeze running along over looking Chatham and a very nice sunset. Over to the Memorial and along to Fort Amherst, fingers cross the gate is open. It is and I’m in and heading down the only down hill section of this run. I have to do a quick pit stop as my lace has come undone, that’s a first and I sort it out quicker than a F1 pit team and push on.

At the 2km mark, 7:45 min/km seems like a pretty good sustainable pace so far, but I’ve hardly been taxed in terms of terrain. The 3rd km is on the flat back towards Medway park and comes in at 7:37 min/km still looking pretty consistent. But I’m now facing a km of hill, worse it stretches out in front of me getting steeper and steeper in all it’s glory. The only good news is I’m feeling pretty fresh.

I’m a 3rd of the way up the long incline and I’m trying to convince myself I don’t want to risk it, the hill gets steeper (twice in two humps) into the distance, that in fact I’d be better off taking a left or a right and continue running on the flat. I get to the fork in the road and think sod it, better to fail trying than fail worrying about it. I run straight on up, definitely having to put in a shift. My breathing is getting laboured, legs are feeling heavy and my feet are going numb, been here before it’s just a question of slowing it down a bit and sucking it up.

I finally get to the top of the incline back at the Memorial, not surprisingly slower at 7:56 min/km and I’m trying to calm myself down, slow the breathing down focus on keeping my running form efficient. The last km is flat and then down hill so in spite of the the fact I’m knackered and sweating like a pig, it’s going to get done. I get my head back down, just need to hang in there 8 more minutes and it’ll be in the bag.

The last km comes in at 7:36 min/km thanks to the terrain, bringing the whole 5k in at 38m 56secs, a new PB by about a minute. I’ll take it, I’m just happy to get another 5k in the bag, hitting my target of getting two 5k runs this week.

 

What an up and down week of running. Two fails, two 3k’s and two 5k’s just about got the job done. It would be in my interest to avoid the fails going ahead, although they are all good data points. I’ve  managed to improve my pace overall by 30 seconds a km, which is good and when the runs go to plan I’m feeling a lot more comfortable. I’ve noticed on both the 5k runs my feet tend to go numb in the last 2k, might need to look into that – might be as simple as tying my laces too tight (I kid you not).

Next week I’m going to aim to do 2x3k and 2x5k without the drama, it’ll be interesting to see if there is any measurable improvements in pace. One of my goals is to secure that 30m, 5k still seems a way off yet.

Run Rating : 

P25KRunning

P25K – Week 2

27th August 2018 — 0

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Run 1 (19/08/2018)

I’d agreed to meet some good friends at the local park, under the pretence of walking their dog. The reality was they were there to catch Pokemon and I’m not just talking about the kids. My plan was to get up there early and do some more quick km laps and hopefully knock out at least 4k before they turned up. I got up to the park 45 minutes early working on the basis I’ll just keep running till they turned up.

The first km was probably one of the quickest I’ve done and I knew about it by the time I hit the second lap, I was already starting to struggle, legs heavy and breathing hard all the way back up the incline.

I managed to recover something before I hit the 2km incline but I was definitely in a losing battle. I was getting a sinking feeling of deja vue. My last run around the island, I had failed to hit the 4km mark and this run was rapidly heading the same way.

The 3km mark was really tough I only just made it up the incline, my lungs where burning and my pace was dropping off rapidly. I had one last km and I had little left to get it done, any idea of doing extra distance had long gone. Then I spotted my friends and their kids waiting for me and I had to make that judgement call, run past them and complete the 4k or stop and be sociable. Two microseconds later decision made I pulled up and said hello, I’m only human!

This run was tough, not as tough as the island, I’m starting to suspect the residual radiation from swapping out nuclear submarine cores is affecting my running down there, more like my kryptonite than gaining superhero powers.

I’ve got enough stats now to draw a performance baseline. Sub 8 min/km are tough, sub 7:30 are not maintainable probably beyond 2-3 km’s and the closer I go to 7 min/km, the closer to melt down (topical) I get.

Let’s talk about the elephant in the room. My weight, I’ve lost little since I started running. To be fair I’ve done nothing with my diet and it still features far to much junk food, so this doesn’t come as a huge surprise to me. Now, it’s definitely the case some of my fat has become muscle, apart from my legs, my stomach is (and I use the word very loosely) more toned, i.e. there are muscles under the fat where before there was just more fat.

But at this point the net weight loss is as close to zero to be statistically insignificant. This leaves me dragging 18st/114kg/251lbs which I’m starting to suspect might just be slowing me down a tad. I think if I’m going to get really serious about improving my times it’s going to be done in the kitchen not out in the field.

  

 

I had some excellent feedback on Reddit to my “Is there life after C25K?” post. Firstly the general consensus was switching to running 4 days a week instead of 3 would appear to have significant benefits. The big benefit of completing C25K was improved fitness, the true value of which is for a fixed time I can now burn more calories (compared to walking or sitting on the couch). Having got to this point, actually using the ability more often is a bit of a no-brainier. It also has the added bonus of removing my dilemma of when and where to take that pesky extra rest day.

In addition mixing my runs up with shorter/faster runs and longer/slower runs seems to be a common theme. I like the idea of that, it will keep things interesting alternating the goals. But before we really get into this I need to pull my finger out and achieve the distance at all costs.

Run Rating : 

Run 2 (21/08/2018)

This run was influenced by this post from nobodez. I had already set my mind that I was going to run beyond 4k and this just cemented my resolve to not leave the field before 5k was in the bag. Like the tortoise and the hare, I’d been obsessed with speed, nobodez just cracked it out slow and steady (just like the C25K program taught).

Walking up to the field I’m running through my pre-flight checks, this is going to be as tough as I want to make it. Too quick and I will struggle to finish, I now I need to keep my lap times slower than 8 min/km if I’m going to stand a chance. That’s 40+ minutes of running on paper, and I’m sure I can follow nobodez’s example.

I get to the field and set off clockwise for a change, I run this route less often and I have less mental baggage associated with it, a cleaner slate. The park is busy with the usual collection of families enjoying a slightly cool summer evening. The first km and I’ve got slow and steady going around like a mantra in my head. I’m deep in energy management mode every step being micro-managed to find the least amount of effort to keep going. I am Leonidas ….

My battle is a pure exercise in giving nothing away, not giving a single joule of energy more than I need to give to keep moving forward. I reach the first km mark and not surprisingly I’m feeling pretty good.

I hit the 2km mark and I’m still plodding away, still saving my energy, still biding my time. The 3km mark seems to take an age to arrive. The voices are trying their usual “not even half way” nonsense. I’m feeling fine as I finally hit the 3km mark, I know at that point that it’s on, not only am I feeling pretty fresh I’m actually recovering 100% before hitting the incline.

It’s taken 27 minutes to get to 3k, far slower than my normal pace and I’m clearly looking beyond 40 minutes. Damn the time, I’ll be out here until it’s done. My brain starts calculating distances, possible finishing lines, key milestones I block it all out, I don’t care. The finish line is 5k wherever that ends up being. I get my head down and get back to my slow and steady mantra, give away nothing!

I reach the top of the park at 4km and I’m still feeling pretty good, In fact I’d actually go as far to say I was tentatively enjoying it, careful not to count my chickens to early. Head back down, sweat is pouring off my cap in an almost continuous bead, My dayglo orange top is in now two tone (dark top, light bottom), not even this hi-tec fabric can cope with my torrential down pour. I don’t care I wipe the sweat out of my face, take off the cap and give it a wave around before reseating it and getting back to the job at hand.

One last time up the incline, I’m having to dig in towards the top but there was nothing that was going to stop me at his point, I’d been up this way in far worse states many times before. I’m now plodding along, waiting for the 5k announcement, I (as always) have a good idea of how far it is. I finally cross the finish line, 5k in 45:41. My first thought is not hurrah but how much have I got left in the tank. The answer comes back at LEAST another km probably more, wow! My second thought is amazing I ran for 3/4 of an hour, followed by damn that’s slow 45m for 5k.

I’ve engaged a controlled stagger towards the exit, trying to wring my cap out. I’ve talked before (in C25K) about my inability to celebrate these milestone moments, this was no different. Probably my biggest running milestone (the big 5 K) and all I can manage is an internal nod of recognition, allowing myself just enough time to carve a mental notch before I turn to post run analysis and the mental planning and expectations of the next run kicks in.

 

It is of course good to finally get to 5k after all these weeks, but I can’t help but feel the run was ultra-conservative, in fact it technically didn’t even count as jogging at less than 4 mph. I need to try another 5k run on my next outing and try to find a faster sustainable pace, somewhere around an 8 min/km would actually count as jogging and should result in a 40 minute 5K. The challenge is I don’t know how to run to a given time, I might have to do some investigation.

Run Rating : 

Run 3 (23/08/2018)

I had every intention on this run to go out there and do 5 x 8 min/km laps, following on from the last run. It didn’t play out that way, so let’s get the excuses out of the way first:

  • I finally got to run at 2pm, it was meant to be earlier in the day, but the rain had put paid to that
  • I could still feel the effort of the last run in my legs, especially in the thighs.
  • I hadn’t eaten, thinking I was running in the am and by 2pm my stomach was growling but I hate running with undigested food in my stomach.
  • I had taken the pup for a long walk to tire him after the rain stopped around 11am.
  • The reason for the extra long (almost 2 hour) walk was I was going to leave him on his own for the first time in his crate and I wanted him dog tired. It’s fair to say this was preoccupying most of my day and a lot of my thoughts on the run.
  • I hadn’t found a pacing app so I was having to wing it on the pace.
  • My Bluetooth headset battery died.
  • The dog ate my homework?

The bottom line is I turned up badly prepared, hungry in the wrong way and preoccupied. When my tunes gave up just after the 3km mark that was enough. I was tired, absolutely soaked (from sweat) and more worried about what my pup was doing in my absence (even though Wen was keeping an eye on him via webcam). I’m not sure who’s suffering separation anxiety more, evidently he just whined for a couple of minutes and went to sleep for the remainder of the time.

The first two laps were pretty much on target for 8 min/km, the 3rd lap is a bit more telling I was starting to struggle. I need to get better at picking up the pace on the down hill section of the run, I’m definitely coasting at the moment. I think I could have got to 5km at this pace if my head had been in the right place, if I’d applied anywhere near the same level of focus as the previous run.

 

I’m a bit frustrated that I only achieved 3km when I set out to do 5km, and not for the first time this week either. I would classify my running at the moment as “brittle”, it takes very little for me to be undone. I’m lacking the discipline of getting to the field and switching everything else off and turning up to really run, that’s what makes the difference ultimately and it’s something I’ve got to get better at.

I’m going to run 4 times this week, my next run will be on Saturday. I’m hoping my legs have fully recovered, I’m running either way, they will need to adapt.

Run Rating : 

Run 4 (25/08/2018)

Taking all the good advice to heart, I decided to fit in a 4th run this week, back at the local park and I  was determined that it was going to be 5k. After the distractions of the last run I turned up to this one focused, fed, charged up (headset) and ready to get the bit between my teeth.

I knew what I needed to do, 5 x 8m = 40 minutes that was the target, a pace that on paper I should be able to sustain if I manage the situation correctly. The park was oddly quiet for a Saturday, slightly overcast and cool so good running conditions.

I set of clockwise, dodging an errant ball near the play area, trying to judge the pace. The first km came in at 7:32. Far too quick, so I dialled it back and tried to get into a steady pace, the second km was 8:04 pretty much on the money. By the third km, I started to feel the early pace in my legs, lots of puffing back up to the top of the park in 8:17. I’d made a conscious effort halfway round to slow it down on the hill, I MUST finish the full 5k first.

I reset my mindset, 2 laps to go, I just have to get around twice more, I was on target for a 40 minute 5k I just needed to keep going. The 4th km was really tough I was trying to fully recover all the way down the incline, with little success. I knew I was in trouble, a rising feeling of nausea and I was struggling to find the resolve to go backup the incline, so I bottled it.

To be fair I had a 6 hour karting event on the Sunday for a mate’s stag and I couldn’t afford to damage myself. So I compromised, I’d keep running but I’d do it by running back home, about a km, which had the benefit of being half flat and half down hill, I’d glide it home. Not surprisingly the last km was quicker at 7:54, thanks to the terrain rather than any effort on my side.

I ended up staggering to a stop about 20 yards from the house in 40 minutes 19 seconds not bad at all. Ok, I might have cheated a little on that last kilometre, but I was sure my body would thank me an hour into karting.

 

All in all a good week of running, more lessons learned, more kilometres under my belt and I finally not only earned my first 5k, but improved on it by 5 minutes at a jog (>4mph yippee). It has blown a big hole in my original plan of building up to 5k over 3 weeks, thankfully.

Next week is going to be interesting, I need to bag a couple more 5k’s at least, I’m under no illusions I won’t be finding another 5 minutes (i.e. 35m/5k) in a hurry, it’s going to take time and distance. I want to get to the point where 5k is my short run and I can start adding kilometres, but that is also practically a few weeks off. Next week more consolidation.

Run Rating : 

AnimalsDog Days

Archer – Week 6

18th August 2018 — 0

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Archer week 6, has it only been 6 weeks? It seems like an eternity. He’s now just over 3 months old and continues to grow at an incredible rate. He looks very gangly at this point with legs that are far too long and paws that look like hand-me-downs from an older sibling. I’m sure he’ll grow into them. In addition, his front end appears to be growing at twice the rate of his back end, so he’s starting to look like he’s skipping leg day at the gym.

Along with his physical growth, he continues to mature as a stroppy, arrogant, opinionated little bundle of attitude. He’s almost perfected his sad puppy eyes look, which he pulls out anytime he’s asked to do anything. He just needs his bottom lip to wibble and he’d be able to do a very passable impression of a rain-soaked orphaned child from a Dickensian novel. It’ll be a future Oscar-winning performance for sure. The only cure for such attacks is to pull out a treat, which has the instantaneous effect of returning him to being a lovely cuddly model of man’s best friend. It’s fair to say this Jekyll & Hyde act is running a little bit thin.

Rice and chicken

As far as I can make out, raising a puppy especially a Golden Retriever appears to be mostly about trying to secure a solid poop. I can now measure the quality of my days by the firmness of my pups faeces. After last weeks bout of diarrhoea, we managed to get Archer back to solids. Unfortunately, this only lasted a couple of days before I was facing another 3am double cleanup; at least this time he didn’t walk it around the room.

We knew it was bad when Wednesday morning he decided he wasn’t going to have breakfast, he didn’t even go and look at the bowl. This was a first, he’s always eaten his food no matter what consistency it might be coming out the back. We gave him until lunchtime to see if he’d turn it around, no joy. It was time to break out the secret weapon – rice and chicken.

For a pup that had 10 other siblings, Archer has surprisingly never been what I would call a food-oriented dog. He sits quietly and watches me prepare his kibble, I put it down, he’ll stroll over and slowly chomp it down over a few good minutes. In fact this week I was deliberately putting my hand in his bowl and taking bits out while he was eating it, an exercise from puppy club to stop him being possessive around food, and one Archer clearly didn’t need.

Until of course, he tasted rice and chicken, he literally breathed the whole bowl down in 10 seconds flat and I was in no doubt that if my hand had been in the bowl I’d now be fingerless. This was his first taste of chicken and it might as well have been the first time he’d ever eaten. He had to go back and check his bowl several times to ensure that he hadn’t missed anything before trying a “Please sir, can I have some more”  act for several minutes.

He had rice and chicken for supper as well, breaking his previous speed record by a clear 2 seconds. The good news is, it sorted his bowel movement out beautifully. He made it through the night and delivered a prize albino deposit the next morning. The only issue now is he won’t eat his scientifically balanced puppy kibble anymore. We tried for two meals and he skipped both, in the end, we ended up having to put a bit of chicken under his dry food to get him to eat it. So it appears we’ve made a rod for our own back.

I Have A Voice

Archer has well and truly discovered his voice. What started as a whimper which tended to scare him more than anyone else has developed into a full-throated and at times ear piercing bark. I’m trying to convince myself this is a good sign of his ongoing development, What isn’t so great is it’s now his go-to form of communication, he’ll bark when he’s happy, excited, frustrated or upset. Which pretty much covers all the waking states of a 3-month-old puppy. And if you thought there was at least respite when he sleeps, think again he whimpers, chomps and muffled barks his way through the nights as well.

When left in the garden, invariably to let him get on with his number 2’s as he doesn’t like being watched (don’t go there), he used to just sit at the gate when he was done. Those days are gone, now it’s barks of “Oi! I’m done” echoing around the neighbourhood at 6:30 in the morning or 10 in the evening. Best of all if he keeps barking for more than 30 seconds he’s joined in serenade by at least two other dogs in the vicinity.

The real problem is the first and most important rule of training him not to bark, is to never return to him when he’s doing it. Whoever came up with that sage piece of advice I wager has never had to balance its application against continuing to let your pup wake up the entire neighbourhood. During the day I let him bark his heart out, but it’s not a strategy I can employ at all hours unless I want a brick through the window. We are going to make a few changes to his morning, evening routine to reduce the chances he’ll need to feel the need to bark.

He’s also taken to barking when he’s frustrated, either because someone isn’t playing fair with him (usually me) or if someone is doing something interesting (i.e. anything) in another room and he isn’t involved, he’ll whine and then start barking. These two are much easier to correct, although I’m not sure I can resist winding him up.

The last form of barking is insanely overexcited barking, if he thinks he’s getting chicken in his kibble (see above) he literally loses it. He honestly just doesn’t know what to do with himself, so he’s taken to barking out of sheer joy, I suspect if he wasn’t barking he’d have exploded in a puff of fur. It’s an easy one to fix, but funny as hell to witness.

Puppy Club

He finally made it back to Puppy Club this week, and in addition to the usual pups:

  • Teddy the tiny Maltese terrier cross (I’m not sure what with – possibly an ant). He’s tiny!
  • Lucy the Golden Retriever, a month older than Archer
  • a Pomeranian (I keep missing the name of)

We were joined by two lovely French pugs, whose names I didn’t catch either. The usual round of letting them off their leashes, leaving Lucy and Archer to last. The other pups tentatively explored the room and carefully introduced themselves to each other, all very civilised. Then the terrors were unleashed and all hell broke loose, with the usual violent play of two retrievers going at each other hammer & tong. Archer as normal spent most of the time on his back with Lucy at his throat, tail wagging, like a concuss boxer pleading for the towel to NOT be thrown in.

Amazingly the other dogs were starting to get the hang of this game, the french pugs joined in. Archer had Lucy and the two pugs on him at one point. Still loving it, still pleading for one more round. When Teddy the Tiny Terrier launched himself into the fray as well, trying to bite Lucy’s legs out from under her there was almost a cheer, this was the dog under the underdog. I think it’s the first time I could see the attraction of such a small and tenacious breed.

This weeks command was “wait”, we were on shaky ground as Archer has yet to fully grasp the temporal aspects of anything. If a dog year is equal to seven human years, a dog second equates to about a micro-second, I’d tried to teach him the command a dozen times over the last few weeks and it always ended up with a confused pup. Luckily Wen had decided she was going to do this week’s command before we got there.

The rest of the pups did fairly well, in fact, one of the pugs was doing so well that it took several minutes for him to actually realise he could have the treat. When Archer’s turn came, the first attempt as far as Archer was concerned was a complete success. Sit, Wait, Treat (all in under 3 microseconds). To the casual observer it might have looked like he had gone straight for the treat, but with the right equipment, it’s possible to see him sit, look at his gangly leg at an imaginary wristwatch and then casually get up to retrieve his reward. No point waiting for the specific commands, better to anticipate.

His second attempt was helped by the lady running the session firmly holding still for approximately 2 seconds given the definite impression of a planned wait.

Pooping Feng Shui

I’m sorry to labour the pooping anecdotes, but it’s a big part of my life these days and I need to get this observation of my chest if only to ensure I’m not going mad. Archer’s trip to the garden for number twos should be a straight line from the patio to the poop spot, on a chilly evening that would be by my reckoning the most efficient way to get this simple task done.

Why therefore does he spend a good minute of his (and my) time, nose down tail up darting around the lawn like he’s trying to find pooping nirvana. As far as I can tell the route to the spot is as close to seemingly random as I’ve ever seen in nature. I’ve been fooled on occasion into thinking he’s found it only for him to change his mind at the last minute (the tease), the stars clearly did not align. Before I waste the rest of my days trying to find order in this chaos, I’m hoping someone already has some insight.

In the last week, he’s also taken to doing a final flurry after pooping, where he walks forward two steps and makes a token gesture of trying to bury it with two quick back kicks before walking off. He does it with such gusto he looks like a prancing Matador, after an epic victory. What in all of nature is the purpose of this move? He’s not buried it, at best he’s taken another two notches out of my lawn. If someone could please explain to me what the purpose is other than a puppy fist pump at another successful delivery, I honestly would sleep better at night.

DRAGGIES

Last week we were enjoying some lovely walkies. This week Archer has given up walking in favour of sitting and staring into the middle distance or working on his orphaned child impression. This has taken what should be 15-20 minute sessions and extended them out to roughly an hour. A combination of treats and tricks usually gets him moving again. On a couple of occasions I’ve been tempted to drag him (I am only human) he goes down more spectacularly than Ronaldo in the penalty box, so it’s hardly practical.

It’s frustrating, to say the least, there is definitely a pattern here where he will learn something, do it correctly for a period of time then regress, we keep seeing it playing out in different forms and has to be hands down the hardest part of raising a pup.

The highlight of this weeks walking was the opportunity to meet a truly humongous gentle St Bernard. The paws of which were the size of Archer’s head, when he went to unceremoniously sniff him between the legs (as is their way) his muzzle was larger than the gap between Archers front and back legs, sending him onto his back. All the time covering him in a wall of drool. What a fantastic creature, I’m not sure Archer was so impressed he seemed to have pissed himself. I doubt he’ll meet many dogs larger, which is a real shame.

I’m sure we’ll get the walking back on track, I have to keep reminding myself he’s only 3 months old. Patience, grasshopper!

P25KRunning

P25K – Week 1

14th August 2018 — 0

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Having completed Couch to 5K (C25K) I found myself with a lot of work still left to do. The program teaches you to run for 30 minutes, unfortunately that does not equate to 5k with my pace. I’m not alone, it’s fair to say most people who complete C25K will struggle to get it done in 30m during the program. So where do I go from here?

AnimalsDog Days

Archer – Week 5

12th August 2018 — 2

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Walkies

We’ve been on several walks now and Archer is not surprisingly loving them. He loves being constantly fussed over by every passerby. He invites it, pulling at the leash to meet each and every new friend. Most people (80%) will take the time to run through the “ohhh he’s so cute” routine, usually asking his age and pointing out how fluffy he is, just in case I hadn’t noticed (my black t-shirt covered). He laps it up.

I do however worry about the odd person who doesn’t interact with him in some way, not even a smile. I’m not talking about runners or otherwise occupied people or the small number of people who are obviously afraid of dogs, you can spot them a mile off, their body language gives it away and I make a point of putting him on a very short leash. I’m talking about the very small number who upon seeing a puppy making a bee line for them, show absolutely no interest. It seems unnatural to me, and I find myself thinking Archer is a natural Voight Kampff test, and worryingly not all of these people are passing it.

After the attention, it’s the smells he loves the most, the little nooks and crannies that have obviously been turned into doggy bulletin boards. He reads each one avidly decoding the secret messages left by his kin. Occasionally he’ll just stop, head up, nose twitching he’s definitely having a completely different experience to me on these dewy morning walks.

He had been pushing his luck when greeting other dogs in the park for the last week. Clearly not showing respect and tending to bounce around a little too over excited. That was until a lovely German Shepherd finally annoyed by his over zealousness decided she had enough and gave him what for, pinning him to the ground and giving him a close up look at her very impressive set of teeth.

He got the message and it stuck, since then he’s approached all dogs (big or small) with a little bit more respect Getting down low and reducing his bouncing as much as any excited pup possibly can. It’s funny to try and see him get lower than a terrier, especially as he gets bigger.

devourer of worldS

At home things have not been so great. He loves to chew things, all things. If it fits in his mouth he’ll chew it and given half a chance swallow it. The biggest problem with his chewing is it’s left him with an upset stomach for the last week. He couldn’t make puppy class, for fear of leaving a stream of brown stinking liquid across the vet reception. It’s hugely frustrating that he doesn’t seem to connect his predicament at the back end with what’s going in at the front end.

The lowest point was 3am on Thursday I’ve awoken to a godawful stench I’ve got up and gingerly tip toed to the light switch to discover a chocolate milkshake. Luckily he had hit the puppy pad and so in my bleary eye state I’ve started to clean it up. I tie it up in a bag and take it downstairs. On my return I’m hit again by the smell, only to realise he’s done a second equally large pool of poop, again on the remaining pad (good boy). I then realise in horror that’s he stepped in this one and walked it around the room. Quarter of an hour later and another bag of liquid poop, I head downstairs to lose the bag. On my final return to the room, I find Archer on my bed, on my bed with uncleaned paws. I think that’s when I lost the will to live.

The next day I woke up in a fowl mood, too little sleep and the smell of doggy poop still in my nostrils, worse Archer also woke up on the wrong side of the bed and he was being extra arrogant too boot. We spent the morning huffing and puffing at each other. I finally went for a run to clear my head and get some alone time, to get my shit (no pun intended) together.

He continues to push the boundaries of what’s acceptable at all times, it seems like a battle of will’s most of the time. In many instances the only way to win is to distract him with treats, but it’s a hollow victory to have to cheat.

Back to the vet

By Saturday he’s dropping dark (although thankfully solid) black poops, which can be a danger sign of an upper intestine/stomach bleed. He’s not got any other symptoms, in fact he’s his usual arrogant self. But we resign ourselves with a trip to the vet, if only to put our minds to rest. Waiting in the vet reception (the same one he plays in weekly) he’s loving meeting all the dogs and people going past.

A gorgeous border collie sits down next to us, 2 years old and a professional working dog the owner tells us, in fact on his way up to Yorkshire tomorrow for two weeks worth of competition trials with the rest of his pack. I can’t recall seeing a dog that was so focused, just sitting there looking around the room you could see it analysing everything, it interacted with all the other dogs and people.

When Archer decided to do his puppy play nonsense the border collie growled and bared it’s teeth, Archer was being very slow on the up take, continuing to annoy her, until she had no choice but to make her annoyance clear. As with the German Shepherd earlier in the week he was solidly put in his place. It is a lesson he needs to learn, not every dog wants to play, especially a working dog that has little tolerance for the bullshit of a puppy.

The vet finally calls us in and gave Archer the once over, everything was normal he wasn’t presenting any  issues, he maybe a little bit gassy. The vet took his temperature for the first time, catching him off guard, but it too was normal (i’m not sure Archer agreed it was normal). The general consensus was whatever it was it looks like he was practically over it, obviously keep an eye on him and he should be fine.

The vet had also reminded us to sort out his Pet Insurance, Archer was covered a few more days under the original policy thrown in when we picked him up. We had been umming and ahhing about it, trying to make that financial vs risk judgement call. The situation was rapidly resolved when the vet, pointed out a foreign body removal in a big dog could be problematic and they’d just done one that ran to £3k. Imagine a couple of those in the first two years, my sisters lab had already suffered similar self inflicted problems, luckily avoiding a worse case scenario.

Building Bridges

If there’s one area that has made progress, beyond archers ability to grow millimetres with every sleep, it’s his relationship with the cats (photo proof above). There is now mutual respect, he understands not to bounce at them and they’ve twigged if they don’t run he won’t chase them. In fact it’s gone the other way the cats will lay in the hall because they know he won’t pass. If he still puts his nose where it’s not wanted he gets a hiss, with the constant threat of a double tap to the head. I’m starting to think the animal approach to dealing with puppies seems to be far more effective than my treats and kind words.

It’s been the toughest week so far, between his dodgy tummy and Archer’s increasing bloody mindlessness it’s not been a huge bundle of fun this week. The only silver lining is I might still be on target for a Xmas card with cats and dogs sleeping together, fingers crossed.

C25KRunning

C25K – Week 9 – Run 3

7th August 2018 — 2

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The last run of the program W9D3, it’s graduation day and I’m determined to go out in style by completing my first 5k.

By my calculations (based on previous runs) I’m looking at another 8-10 minutes of running beyond the 30 minute primary goal of today’s session.

Up until now I’ve been running routes that tended to have an incline. My secret weapon in this endeavour is a pool table flat route along the riverside country park, and by a complete fluke it’s almost dead on 5k end to end, it must be a sign.

I decide to walk to the park, which in of itself is a 30 minute walk as I have some errands to do en route. The weather is sticky, it looks like the darkening cloud cover might finally deliver some real rain later, in the meantime a fewer small showers during the day have done nothing but make it feel muggy. Not ideal running weather, but it doesn’t matter I’ve run hotter and damper in the last 2 months.

I finally reach the park and set off at a slightly quicker than normal pace, I’m really banking on the lack of hills enabling me to up the pace a bit, which in turn should mean a time closer to 38 minutes and I can finish just that little bit sooner.

5 minutes in and I’m coming around a blind corner on the outside just as a mountain biker comes hurtling past. It’s clear he’s not going to be able to stop in spite of his best efforts and I have to dive out the way. No harm and like true Brits, both parties are apologising profusely as we head away from each other. Note to self, on tracks with cyclists hug the inside of the corner rather than the outside, it’s probably safer.

Out to ten minutes, it’s going ok, but I’m not really enjoying it. The humidity feels worse than most of my previous runs, and there is practically no breeze. Worse still the tide is out and the river bed is properly stinking, some full on botanicals for you gin lovers. I’ve also realised my originally planned route is going to leave me at the far end of the park, doh! I need to switch it up and start running the long leg out now so I’m running back, otherwise I’m looking at an 1+ hour warm down walk home. I hand’t factored that into my route when I was armchair planning with Google Earth.

15 minutes and I’m going up the only real incline on the entire route, it’s two small hills back to back. Nothing major but by the time I’d got over the second one at about 20 minutes I’m starting to feel it. More so the humidity seems to be making my profuse sweating totally ineffectual. I do a quick status check, everything is fine, no reason to stop running, looks like I’m clear out to 30m.

25 minutes, I’m really not enjoying it now, I’m having to slowly start digging in a bit. Then my phone goes, it’s my sister I’m expecting her call, just not right now. It’s an important family matter, not right now. I do the maths, could be another 12-14 mins before I can ring her back. I tell myself there is no way I’m going to stop before 30 minutes I will complete the program and the primary goal at ALL COSTS!

I push on convincing myself, she can wait 12 minutes. The distractions aren’t helping, I’m now worrying about what she’s going to tell me when I speak to her. The last few minutes of the 30 are grim, but I just keep slogging away at it, I’ve been here often enough now to know the score, my pace is getting slower and slower. I finally get the 30m well done from Laura, and I’m thinking ok let’s just keep going to 4k at least that’s only a couple of minutes away.

My phone goes, it’s my sister again I can’t ignore her this time, given the situation. So I pull up and answer, but I’m secretly relieved I didn’t have to do another 8 minutes. Shame on me! Walking back having spoke to my sister (which was good news) I’m struggling to see this run as a positive. Yes I’ve finished the program that I started all those weeks ago, but I’m frustrated at myself for not finishing it with that all important 5k trophy.

The stats. My fastest average pace to date, resulting in a new PB to 3km.

 

But, I’m honestly not happy. I’m not happy at getting all the way out to 30 minutes and then being relieved that I didn’t have to do the extra 8 minutes, it’s pathetic. I’m not happy that I let the weather impact me so or that a phone call distracted me as much as it did. I’m really not happy that I robbed myself of the 5K I desperately wanted out of today’s session.

Before I even get back home, I’m critically analysing the run, deconstructing all it’s little mistakes and failures and I’m getting angry, I’m planning the next run in my head and I’m making mental notes to address my short comings.

And I think that best sums C25K for me, it’s true legacy. There is no happy ending, or big celebration party or even a pat on the back. Instead, there is a genuine hunger to go further and faster. Even if I had reached the 5k mark on this run I’d have been annoyed at the time, in fact I realise only now there was no way I could ever complete C25K and be happy.

A little over 2 months ago, I could hardly run for 8 minutes and that was with 90 second breaks, I now consider 20-25 minutes the commute time to where I need to start working. Where before I was beset with malediction both physical and mental, I’m now increasingly able to run without drama, to focus purely on the running.

It’s a truly stunning transformation and one I could not have comprehended even a couple of weeks ago. C25K works! It does exactly what it says on the box, you WILL be able to run for 30 minutes by the end of it. But be under no illusion that it will not be easy, “Nothing that’s worthwhile is ever easy” (Nicholas Sparks). But you might just find yourself standing on the top of this peak espying a misty summit in the distance with envious eyes.

Now I’ve got to go and figure out what I do now. I’m obviously going to go get me a 5k for starters. I’ll probably follow that up with trying to bring my 5k times to something approaching 30m as a hopefully achievable target for my old bones. I might take a closer look at 10k, I like the idea that it goes back to interval training as that has worked so well to get me to 5k, and I understand improved pace is almost a side effect of distance.

I need to put some structure around all this starting with a new app. It’s farewell to Laura, I’ll only hear her voice in my dreams or more likely nightmares; “You’ve got this!!!! Argggghh!!!”. I think I might have a touch of Stockholm syndrome.

Run Rating : 

Week 9 - Run 2

 

 

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